It isn't surprising, what with the world falling apart and all, that the world scarcely noticed that I lost my job as an editor in April 2009. Why should it? I was one of millions of Americans who lost their job that month.

But it mattered to me.

It wasn't all bad. No more early morning commutes. And no more Lisa. Lisa was my boss. My mean boss. My mean and crazy boss. In the long run, I stand to save thousands of dollars on therapy.

Those Drugs Ain’t Mine, I’m Famous

Oh, Paris Hilton. What’s funny is that we really hadn’t heard much about the heiress until recently, but she must have thought it necessary to get back into relevancy with her latest round of arrests and controversy. Just days after a man holding “two big knives” tried to break into her Los Angeles home, Hilton was arrested on suspicion of cocaine possession in Las Vegas.

“A straight flush always beats a full house” reads the business card of Abe Jones Septic Service, owned by Mark and Gayle Johnson for the last 20 years. Employing seven, including Mark’s son Tim and son-in-law Matt Finnestad, this family’s business is all we would rather flush and forget.

Mark is actually the third Abe Jones, as explained by Matt: “Abe is fictitious. Sherman Jones was the original, and Mark thinks he picked Abe to be first in the phone book.” Though Mark doesn’t advertise, Abe Jones Septic Service is well known, with most business coming from word-of-mouth. They work as far as Summit Lake and all the way south of China Hat. Where there’s a mess, Abe Jones Septic is available.

After drawing the ire of neighbors in northeast Bend, the county has scheduled a pair of open houses for the community and neighbors to learn more about a pair of mental health transition homes that are slated to open in the area around Pilot Butte.